Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Guest Post: A Year of Self-Discovery

Hello! My name is Raewyn and I blog over at Be a Warrior Queen! You may have seen me hanging out over here this past month...in case you missed me, here's a little about me! 

I'm one of those people that can be loud and in your face, but in the most loveable way ever. I try my best to always be happy and find the positive. My blog is one part being positive and another part starting a movement. I want to start a magazine to empower young women and girls to be themselves unashamedly.  I have a pick up truck named Chuck the Truck; my favorite clothes are 1950s inspired and I drink tea like it's going out of business. I just married my best friend of ten years and couldn't be happier! I would love if you'd stop by my blog and we could become the best of friends!

About a month or two ago, one of my guy friends tried to send me on a covert mission to find out if the girl he is dating wants to be serious. Being the person that I am, I obliged, but with a few questions and reservations for him because she is 21.

I don't have anything against anyone being 21 and in a relationship - I've had friends who got married while they were 21. From my experience, 21 is best served single and full of discovery. Before you get in a tizzy, I'm not saying anyone should break up, I'm just referencing my amazing year of self-discovery, so hear me out.



The month following my 21st birthday, I moved across the street from my ex-boyfriend. We went from a long distance relationship that we couldn't last in, to neighbors who were broken up. I'm not going to lie to you, I snuck in his window a lot and I made a lot of bad decisions when it came to him that year.

I wouldn't change a thing.

You see, I needed to make mistakes and get black out drunk. I was always more of a good girl, and I needed to embrace my wild side to find out where I'm most comfortable. If you're more of a wild child, perhaps you need to take a year of celibacy and reflection. Of course, we're all different. Regardless, self-discovery is best served alone. 

Alone with your thoughts and actions. You should make decisions for yourself, alone. Be a little bit reckless.

When I was 21, I learned a whole lot about myself. I dated a bunch of guys (oh lawd do I have some stories), and kissed a bunch of guys. I went on girl dates and girl trips. I went to way too many concerts - that's a lie, there is no such thing as too many concerts - and flirted with quite a few bands.

photo credit: Daniel Meron

I paid my rent from the tips I made as a food runner. I drove a pick up truck that liked to die on me. I took classes and didn't read the books (well, I still got straight A's somehow).

Write letters to the people who negatively impact you, and thank you cards to those that help you find yourself. Start a blog. Write in a journal. Travel for an extended amount of time.



What I'm trying to say is I took a year for me. It doesn't matter if that year is when you're 18, 21, 30, 52...just take a year to truly discover who you are. Those who love you will understand, because they've needed that year, too.

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